I have had about enough of your antics. It galls me that though I have communicated with you in verbal and written form regarding these upsetting interludes in the symphony of my life that you continue unrelenting in your assault upon my tranquility. I have added you to my prayer list which I send out to the prayer chain of the local Baptist and Free Methodist churches, asking the Lord God to smite you and to raise up his hand and render your man-fruit withered and fecund. To me this seems like a fair shake (pun intended) given that you have taken it upon yourself to glean from my own livelyhood and to excrete your waste upon the objects of comfort that I am so dearly attached to. So ask yourself “Am I ready to be pummeled and Popped by a self trained sword wielding warrior of the night sky?” If the answer is no then I suggest you “take five” to figure out where your future lies. If you mess with the best you are going to get treated like a jest. A bad jest. So in the future if you plan on living, stay out of my room Kyle.

Sincerely, Brad the Dad